I am glad that you choose to be assertive and stand up for your I love Cannabis and coffee Starbucks t-shirt to be respected as a valuable human being. It goes a long way wether you live in Texas or New York. Yay for her on speaking up. It was a teaching moment. It seems like common sense to treat others politely and with respect.
I work in higher education and I see instances taking place where people are promoted from within to managerial positions without ever having the proper training. They may be capable of doing the administrative I love Cannabis and Starbucks shirt but haven’t been properly trained in managing people. I think this is a very important missing link all around.
One time I had a senior engineer walk up to my desk and ask me to take notes during a meeting for a project I was not assigned to. I asked him if he has asked any of the other male technicians in my department to do this task. He said no and I told him no too.
I had a similar experience. Myself and two other I love Cannabis and coffee Starbucks t-shirt were recruited as engineering interns for an oil and gas firm. On my first day, my boss told me he specifically asked for a female because the administrative assistant was going on leave and he needed replacement.
I told him I came to the company to learn and the position he was offering won’t teach me what I needed. Long story short, I turned him down politely and did only technical tasks assigned to me. Good on you to take such bold moves.
I did this once too. I was a member of a task force and the admin person who typically took minutes wasn’t able to be at a meeting. I was the only other woman on the task force, so he asked me to take minutes. I said No, I’m on this task force to participate in the discussion. I can’t do that if I’m taking notes. Also, did you ask any of the men on this task force if they would take notes. Didn’t think so. He never asked me again. Imagine that.
I found myself in a similar I love Cannabis and coffee Starbucks t-shirt, I asked if I was being asked to take notes because I am now the only woman in the room and not only was the request withdrawn and another admin assistant brought in to take notes, but that project manager spread the word to the other managers too.
I’m not a Dr. Phil fan, follower but when I heard him say these words many years ago they resonated with me deeply we teach people how to treat us. He was absolutely correct. If you allow people to use and abuse you and you don’t speak out or speak up then your I love Cannabis and coffee Starbucks t-shirt is collusion. Good for you for teaching your boss how to treat you.
As a Midwesterner with frequent occasion to be in New York I have consistently experienced that the city has a gruff, prickly, hard-shelled exterior that – when met with appropriate sturdiness and buy-in to its ways – a stress test if you will – becomes a warm-hearted family member.
I’m not saying that necessarily applies in this situation – possibly fraught with layers of bias and bigotry – but I’m glad to see she met this stress test with robust self-confidence, self-assurance and self-respect.